How To Measure Your Self Worth
How To Measure Your Self Worth Possessing little self worth can lead people to become depressed, to fall short of their potential, or to tolerate abusive situations and relationships. Too much self-love, on the other hand, results in an off-putting sense of entitlement and an inability to learn from failures.- It can also be a sign of clinical narcissism. Strike A Balance Here are our best insights on how to strike a balance between accurate self knowledge and respect for who you are. But when it comes to measuring self worth, many people use something just as unreliable as a random stick. Measure Your Self Worth You may not even consciously think about how you might measure your self worth. But it's likely that, deep down, you know. After all, when you feel like you're measuring up, you feel good about yourself. But when you feel as though you've fallen short, your self esteem likely plummets. So while you may be aware of those fluctuations in how you feel, you might never stop to think about what type of measuring stick influences you so much. While there are many ways you might measure your worthiness in life, it's important to balance some of them in tangible and intangible terms. Here are seven common ways you can measure your tangible and intangible self-worth: Tangible Measures Of Self Worth 1. Your Appearance Some people measure their self-worth by the numbers on a scale. Others determine their value by how much attention they can attract with their appearance. The media sends a message that "you're only as good as you look," and many marketing strategies target people's insecurities over everything from weight gain to ageing. That's not to say good looks don't serve as an advantage in life; they certainly can. But a beautiful body or a handsome face won't last forever, hair loss, wrinkles, or a middle age spread can feel catastrophic for someone whose self worth depends on their physical appearance. 2. Your Net Worth You likely know at least one person whose self-worth is measured by their income or material possessions. But people who measure their self-worth by their net worth may never feel "valuable enough." And it's not just wealthy people who define themselves by the size of their bank accounts — many people live beyond their means in an attempt to feel "good enough." But going deep into debt to create a façade of wealth backfires in the end because while goods and services have monetary value, they don't reflect your value as a human being. 3. Who You Know There are several ways people depend on others to give them value. While one person may only feel good about herself when she's in a relationship, someone else may feel as though name-dropping well-known people will gain the admiration from others he needs to feel good. Some people only feel worthy when they can surround themselves with important people. A lengthy list of personal contacts and a busy social calendar help them feel valuable and important. But depending on other people to make you feel good is like chasing a moving target. You can't control what other people think of you, and you certainly can't please everyone all the time. You'll never be able to receive enough praise and positive reinforcement to genuinely feel good about yourself. 4. What You Do A career helps many people feel worthwhile. In fact, many people introduce themselves by saying what they do for a living. Their job isn't what they do — it's who they are. Their career reinforces to them that they're "somebody." But basing your self-worth on your job title is a big risk. An economic downturn, unexpected shift in the job market, or a major health problem can put an end to your career and lead to a major identity crisis. If you've always measured your self-worth by what you do, you won't feel good about yourself when your career ends. 5. What You Achieve Sometimes people want to be known solely for their achievement.A person who brags about his/her latest business success may only feel good when talking about the accomplishments. On the other side of the scale, an individual who just can't stop beating themselves up for a mistake made, might struggle to move forward, because he/she didn't achieve what was needed to feel good. 6. You Believe You Are Good Experienced And Qualified When you pitch for new business, you believe that you have sufficient experience and have the qualifications, case studies, and testimonials to back them up. You don’t need another certification, course, degree, or further experience for validation before you feel you are good enough. 7. Your Service Charge Are Based On Your Worth Quite often out of fear of losing business or the desire to win more business, people will undercharge for their services. This is a classic situation where they end up doing much more than they’re paid to do. But, somehow, in a desire to prove themselves, these people still feel that they are not doing enough in relation to how much they are being paid. This can set a precedent which could be hard to remove. I recall many years ago driving to a client site and deep inside I was unhappy and annoyed. This was because I was hugely undercharging and unhappy with myself for continually doing so. Intangible Measures Of Self Worth 1. Recognise The Difference You Make When you know your value, you will confidently approach any negotiation with full belief in your knowledge, skills, experience and the difference you can make. 2. You See Yourself As A Peer In any given situation, knowing your value means feeling that you are an equal with anyone you interact with: clients, bosses, colleagues, or friends. You are not a supplicant. Nor do you feel privileged to be with someone or to work in a particular type of organisation. You have a personal sense of value and deservedness and assert yourself as an equal in personal and business relationships. 3. You Are Clear About Your Values You know your boundaries. You are clear about what is acceptable behavior, how you like to be treated and spoken to, and you have the courage to speak out when necessary. You don’t need external validation to prove your value — instead, you have an internal compass of what is right and wrong. 4. You Are Engaged In Exciting And Fulfilling Activities / Work / Community When you are involved in work or activities benefiting not only yourself but also your family , friends or the local community, that is most fulfilling, as well as financially rewarding. You are more inclined to work with even greater commitment. When you love what you do, you are prepared to do more and to become more, not only for yourself, but for the benefit of others too. 5. You Believe In And Like Yourself Self-esteem is confidence in one’s own worth or abilities. You are comfortable with who you are — your weight, height, and everything that makes and represents you. You are confident in the work you deliver and your sense of professionalism. You like and have a great relationship with people. You' will believe in yourself regardless of whether you've been fired, gone through a divorce, or failed to get a promotion. Experiencing difficulties and overcoming them makes you stronger. 6. You Know Who You Are When you know who you are and you're pleased with the person you've become, you will experience a sense of peace through life's inevitable ups and downs. Instead of chasing things that temporarily boost your self-esteem, measure your self-worth by who you are at your core. Behave according to your values and create a life of meaning and purpose. 7. Knowing Your Value Knowing your value is an emotional subject, It is easy to identify when you don’t feel valued, respected, or appreciated, but knowing your value is somewhat different. But what exactly is knowing your value? Is it having a positive self-esteem? Is it knowing your worth and being able to identify all of your positive qualities? Knowing your value and self-worth are inextricably linked. Self-worth is defined as “the sense of one’s own value or worth as a person.” but the other aspect is being able to understand how much of a difference you have made in any given situation with the contribution you have made.
Believe You Are Good Enough Some of these indicators may resonate with you and others may not, but what is paramount is being clear about your values lead to a greater sense of clarity and confidence about who you are and what you stand for. This can be in your personal life as well as in business. Your confidence will be reflected in how you interact with people, deliver your service, and in the fees you charge or the salary you earn. People who are confident and believe in themselves stand out. How Many Ways Do You Value Yourself? As a suggestion; use the above lists and write down how many ways you value yourself. Be honest. From your list select an area where you may not feel valued or would like to change, and ask yourself this question: If I valued myself more, what would I do in this situation? Who would I be and what would be the first step I would take in asserting my self-worth? The purpose of this exercise it to encourage you to recognise the qualities that lie within you and the areas that you need to work on. By understanding your own value, you are able to add value and provide a better service to your family, friends, clients and community . Remind yourself every day that you are worthy and have value.
Michael J Robey
Psychic Medium | Psychic Investigator